New ROBOCOP Suit Induces Roboyawns

Comedian Patton Oswalt says that a good movie title should essentially play a little movie in your head when you hear it.  His prime example: Texas Chainsaw Massacre.  That's a title just dripping with imagery that literally gets better with every word.  In the amazing title contest, Robocop has to come in a close second place, and Paul Verhoeven's 1987 film certainly lived up the amazing promise of that title.  There are plenty of adjectives one can use to describe that movie, but "boring" is not one of them.

And yet, here's our first look at Joel Kinnaman in some version of Alex Murphy's Robocop armor, (courtesy of Comingsoon.net) and it looks phenomenally dull.  I say "some version" because my understanding is that Murphy goes through multiple iterations of his bionic armor, so it's entirely likely that what we're seeing here is akin to Tony Stark's silver Mark II suit from the first Iron Man.

First of all, black is a terrible color choice as you lose all sense of detail, plus it looks completely indistinguishable from the powersuits of a dozen other movies and video games.  Nothing about this armor stands out in any way, which I suspect will be a criticism destined to be leveled against the final film early and often.

Look, I love Nolan's Dark Knight trilogy as much as the next guy, but between this and Bay's Transformer films, Hollywood has become inordinately obsessed with presenting these types of movies within a realistic context, which is exactly the wrong way to approach this particular franchise.  Hell, it's a CYBORG POLICEMAN!  Talk about a genuine excuse to let loose with your imagination.

Meanwhile, here's an early promo banner, via Cine1.

I've been staring at this image all day and I still can't say for certain what the hell I'm looking at.  It appears to be a Robo-thigh, which makes this poster about four inches away from being Robo-porn.

Also?  BORING.